Are You Really Listening?

In Kate Murphy’s book, You Aren’t Listening; What You’re Missing and Why it Matters, she explains that too often our tendency is not to listen, but to simply wait our turn to talk.

Hearing is passive. Listening is active. The best listeners focus their attention and recruit other senses to the effort. Their brains work hard to process all that incoming information and find meaning, which opens the door to creativity, empathy, insight and knowledge.

Understanding is the goal of listening, and it takes effort. Listening requires, more than anything, curiosity.

Because much of communication and listening is about nonverbal things like tone of voice, tempo and pitch, the recommendation is to have as much communication with your clients on the phone rather than email or text. Sure, electronics are good for quick messages and messages that can be read when the receiver has time; but nothing beats a voice-to-voice conversation and connection. Except, of course, face-to-face communication.

Listening is always a critical skill. In our experience, it’s likely one of the most critical skills for sellers. With the level of uncertainty that still exists for businesses today, it’s even more important to make sure you are listening. This applies to family, friends and, of course, clients. Often people just want to share their feelings and know that someone cares. You can be that caring, helpful person.

Jeff Schmidt is the SVP of Professional Development. You can reach him at Jeff.Schmidt@RAB.com. You can also connect with him on Twitter and LinkedIn.