Why Great Sellers Still Play Small

Bill Mann, my 90+-year-old mentor, believed in me when I didn’t believe in myself. That belief changed the trajectory of my career.

One of the most rewarding parts of working with students in the Media Sales Academy—our partnership between the NAB and RAB—is seeing potential show up before confidence does.

Noel Burch, a learning and development expert at Gordon Training International, introduced the Four Stages of Competence:

1. Unconscious Incompetence – You don’t know what you don’t know.
2. Conscious Incompetence – You realize what you don’t know.
3. Conscious Competence – You know how to do it, but it takes effort.
4. Unconscious Competence – You do it naturally—it’s second nature.

I’m working with a student right now—let’s call her “A,” for privacy reasons. Student athlete. Driven. Disciplined. Great communicator. Thinks strategically. Builds smart ideas. In other words, she has everything you’d want in a seller.

And yet—she keeps telling me how nervous she is. Not because she’s unprepared. Not because she lacks ability. But because she hasn’t fully seen herself yet.

And it got me thinking…

How many sellers today—new and experienced—are in the exact same place? Especially in a world that feels like it’s changing by the minute with AI, digital and new expectations.

Here’s what the research tells us:

Alex Stajkovic, an organizational behavior professor at the University of Wisconsin, developed core confidence theory:

Performance = Skill × Will × Confidence

What happens when confidence is low?

• Even great talent stays quiet.
• Great ideas don’t get shared.
• Great sellers play small.

Often, as leaders, we misdiagnose the problem. We think they need more training, more tools, more scripts. What they really need is belief in their ability to execute what they already know. Because confidence doesn’t replace competence—but it absolutely unlocks it.

So, how do you build confidence?

In her article The Power of Small Wins, Harvard professor Teresa Amabile writes:

“The single most important factor in boosting motivation is making progress in meaningful work.”

In other words, nothing builds confidence like achievement.

You have to celebrate the wins, big and small, with yourself and your team.

Here are four ways to do it:

1. Shrink the moment – Confidence grows from small wins, not big stages. Rehearse. Practice. Role play. Even simulated success builds confidence.
2. Name the evidence – Don’t say “I think I can.” Say: “I’ve done this before.” Confidence is built on proof, not positivity.
3. Focus on the client, not yourself – Nervousness lives in self-focus. Confidence grows in service.
4. Normalize the feeling – When someone feels nervous, anxious or unsure—especially before a big moment—they often assume, “Something must be wrong with me.” That’s the mistake. The feeling isn’t the problem—the interpretation is. Even top performers feel it. They just don’t let it decide for them.

If you’re feeling uncertain right now, it might not be a skill issue. It might be a confidence gap. And the good news? Confidence is trainable. Because sometimes the only thing standing between where you are… and where you could be… is the belief that you belong there.

Think Big, Make Big Things Happen!

Jeff Schmidt is the SVP of Professional Development. You can reach him at Jeff.Schmidt@RAB.com. You can also connect with him on X, YouTube, and LinkedIn.